My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
