Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
