Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
