Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
