I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
