just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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