no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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