He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
