it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
We named our party play list daddy issues
Banned from zoo.
Again?
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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