2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize