I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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