yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I just gargled with NyQuil
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
