Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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