Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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