I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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