he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
