But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize