I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
