I hate your face
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
You are a booty call, not a friend.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
