New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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