well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
