the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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