I love black thongs
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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