I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
