hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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