I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
