I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
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