She is in my trunk
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
