It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize