he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Randomize
