Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
