And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
