Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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