tell your sister to shave her snatch
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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