I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
