i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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