I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
