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• (256): View more from Alabama

  I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.

  (1-703): View more from Virginia

  I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?

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• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.

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• (253): View more from Washington

  You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Best not to. Some people need their delusions.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.

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• (949): View more from California

  I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter

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• (559): View more from California

  He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess

  (852): View more from

  keeper.

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• (818): View more from California

  That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.

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