the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
