You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Semen is not good for contacts.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
