She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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