break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I'm like, not good at living.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
