My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
