absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
