What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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