But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
