I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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