somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
