Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
worst night to have a conscience
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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