A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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